Matt and I've been talking quite a bit lately about being fake. Whether people are genuine in their thoughts or just along to see that they're better than you. What makes them right and you wrong. Them cool and you an outcast. Are they being true...no matter if they are friend or family. What determines "Status"?
Does being underweight mean you're anorexic or bulimic? Does being overweight mean you don't care about yourself and you abuse food? Does having money make you happy? Does having less money make you less important? Does a degree make you smart? Does no college make you a nobody? All these questions go through my mind daily.
Does an older car make you poor? Does a new car make you wealthy? Do tattoos make you mean and rough? Does a big home mean it's filled with love? Does a smaller home mean it lacks love? Does a big yard mean you have lots of room to run and play or is it wasted space? Does a fat paycheck make you better and a smaller one make you worthless? Does a "Title" make you more special than me?
Does losing a home or a car make you unfortunate or a loser?
The reality of it is that YOU never know what ANYONE else is going through and why people look the way they do, act the way they do or feel the way they do.
Matt and I went through things as children and young adults that stunk and were hard. Were both considered different and not cool. Outcast. Just like so many other people. Does being the baby of the family mean you're spoiled. Does that make you a brat? Who decides these things? If us, who are WE for deciding them?
Against all odds, We got married very young and started a family right away. I remember certain people thinking we were pregnant and HAD to get married. Others said our marriage wouldn't last 6 months. Then you add in the long distance marriage for the first year and we apparently were doomed. We have lost cars and a home. We have been to hell and back financially. We have questioned our decisions through the years. One in particular is the decision to let our house go a little over 3 years ago. At the time it seemed right...we hated the neighborhood and all that came with it. Loved the house but that didn't seem to be enough. A few months later we began to regret that decision and started questioning our stupidity. That all leads me to this...happy as can be. Had all these things not happened where would we be. One thing I do know is that because of all the adversity and hardships, I am more grateful and thankful for everything we have now. Never take anything for granted. If I can go crazy and buy my children asinine amounts of things for Christmas and take them on amazing adventures to other places in this great big world, them so be it.
I love my kids. I love my husband. I love my parents. I love my brother. I love my niece. I love WHO I AM and the life I have. THAT makes it all worth it. The trials and tribulations. God knew what he was doing and he done good. The boys actually like going to school everyday. We love were we live and we are at peace in our lives and that's all that really matters.
God has a plan for all our lives and no matter who people think THEY are compared to you, they are NOT better than you. My husband is a trusting, very giving, genuine man. He takes people for who they are, not who he thinks they are, never questioning motives. This is sometimes a fault of his as numerous people take advantage of that.
Not sure what my point to all this was. Just thought it would feel good to get it all out. HA! I was right. I feel better already.
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